The Dread of Role Play

“What’s in a name? That which we call role play
By any other name would smell as sweet.”

Ok so that’s a fairly poor use of a Shakespeare quote and I’m not sure that just changing the name makes ‘role play’ any more a pleasurable prospect. Doesn’t help that it’s from Romeo and Juliet which is a tragedy. Whatever you want to call it – real play, skills practice, acting out, using this form of practice in learning is crucial for development from childhood onwards. As kids we love it, as adults we dread it. In the workshops I have delivered when those words are mentioned the effect on the room is palpable. Pained or frightened expressions, eyes cast downwards and a shift in the feel of the room. And that’s before I even ask for volunteers. And yet few participants and observers would argue that the biggest ‘ah ha’ moments have come from actually practicing what is being preached. I have even heard the words “enjoyable” and “fun” uttered, to which I would add satisfying and rewarding. So what’s the problem and why the pushback every time?

Well, for a start I think the name is wrong and sets the expectation that people will be acting, that they have to get up in front of their peers and perform a scene. The only acting should be from the actor/facilitator/person playing the other role. The participant should only be ‘acting’ as themselves – acting meaning ‘being’, ’functioning’, ‘behaving’. So it’s being yourself in a particular scenario, practicing certain skills, having an opportunity to try something new or a familiar situation in a different way, getting coaching and feedback. It’s important that this context be set up and there is absolute clarity on the objective before the scenario is played out. When it’s not, I have seen role play gone wrong.

As an actor often I am brought in purely to role play, to play characters and scenarios as part of a workshop and give some feedback from my characters point of view. One workshop recently, granted it was a pilot program, highlighted how not to run role play. After some general discussion on communication and rapport, it was announced that the group would now be role playing, trying out meeting and greeting a ‘customer’. One brave volunteer came up and with little ado she was told to launch straight into it. I was clear on my role but unsure as to what skills the participants were to practice exactly. It was clear this participant had no idea either. She giggled, stopped and started, rewinded, was made to start again and her bubbly personality gave way to frustration and uncertainty. Mercifully the interaction was stopped and the floor was open to feedback, again with little structure or context. The facilitator and group meant well but without a clear aim comments were varied, focussed on framing rather than rapport and increasingly our ‘role player’ appeared to take it as criticism as to how she does her job and interacts with customers. After a well-meaning question from the floor – “why did you decide to deal with the customer that way?” the tears came. Positive comments soon flowed in, about her personality and how well she does her job, what the role play was trying to achieve, but it was too late, the damage was done. She never recovered and left at lunchtime. Thankfully the rest of the days’ role plays went well and the intentions and focus on each interaction was more clearly defined. It became a skills practice and group coaching session, providing participants with a chance to practice specific skills and learning from the workshop. As it should be. Granted this reaction is rare and can depend on the sensibilities of the participant, yet each individual must be considered, learning outcomes clear and each role play pitched appropriately.

In another example, also a customer service workshop, the morning was spent on building skills and models step by step, interacting with the audience to relate to their world and build best practice in that context. The last part of the session was role play (we called it skills practice) and it was framed as a chance to practice some of the skills discussed e.g. asking questions, delving, using a GROW coaching framework. Anyone could stop the interaction at any time to get help, feedback, coaching, and advice on next steps, to try a different tack. Essentially the participant controlled the situation and owned their learning outcomes. The rest of the group were role playing with them, they were their ‘bench’, a ‘phone a friend’ as we worked through the scenarios together. Sure there was still silence when the next volunteer was called for but the room felt ‘safe’ and each role play was a learning opportunity for everyone in the room, including me as I got stuck on the content of their working world. A great chance for the group to upskill me! One lady said after her role play that she could see how following a process made it so much easier work through a situation with a customer rather than just jump to solution, yet still be herself. An audience member said during one role play that she saw what she tends to do and watching it has made her realise she needs to stop assuming the customer has the same knowledge and understanding as she does. Individual learning outcomes, feedback and coaching opportunities for the role players and the rest of the group. And not a tear in sight.

In my experience, you can talk to an audience, facilitate discussion, go through models and frameworks, but it’s the doing where the learning comes and with it an increase in the likelihood of people applying these skills back in the workplace. It’s a playground, back to ‘role play’ we loved as kids and amazingly most people commit fully to it, get involved and to varying degrees get drawn into the world being created.

So, call it whatever name you will but as Juliet is telling Romeo with “what’s in a name”, a name is an artificial and meaningless convention, and that what’s behind it is the important thing. You may never love it but for those using it, do so well and for those involved, see it not as struggle and tragedy but embrace it as learning and who knows, even fun.

My tips for role plays done right

• Brief the actor not just in content but also learning outcomes, participants and challenge level
• Set up at the beginning of the session when, how and why the role play or ‘skills practice’ will occur.
• Explain that it’s not a test, the idea is to play around to see what works and where the conversation and situation goes. It’s learning by doing and will feel uncomfortable!
• Make clear the learning outcomes
• Frame up the role plays before beginning. What the focus is, skills being applied, how the interaction will run
• Involve the whole group rather than the person role playing feeling they are on their own
• Where appropriate allow preparation time before the role play
• An option is to break people into groups and one or two people from each group meet the character, with their group as support crew
• Set up the ‘rules’ around stopping the role play, getting help and coaching from the group
• Pitch each role play appropriately given the skill and comfort of each participant and the skill being practiced. There doesn’t have to be conflict every time!
• Structure the feedback. Start with the participant then the group, followed by facilitator and/or actor (role player). Make sure they give ‘what went well’ first.
• Link feedback and debrief to the skills, frameworks and learning areas covered in the workshop
• Use an actor rather than role playing with each other. An actor can take on character behaviours, make it real and give meaningful feedback. Participants are also more likely to take it seriously
• Use real world scenarios and situations that the participants can relate to and apply what they practice in the real world.